The Recipe to Fulfilling & Rewarding Relationships

By Nadia Ahmed ~ Founder at Mind Matters on 30 Apr 2020Health & Wellness

Investing in your relationship can determine whether you have a fulfilling and rewarding relationship or a stressful relationship riddled with resentment and frustration. Research shows that people in unfulfilling relationships are more likely to suffer from depression and have weak immune systems – it’s time to be proactive and intentional to create the type of relationships you want.

Mary Jo Kreitzer, PhD., R.N., says that “healthy relationships enable us to be who we are, they nurture us and help us grow. They help us become better people.” 

Are you tired of having an emotionally and physically draining relationship and are ready to save yourself the distress? The recipe to rewarding and fulfilling relationships is simple and chances are you already have the ingredients tucked away in your pantry already.

The first ingredient is curiosity. They might say “curiosity killed a cat” but that can’t be far from the truth when we are curious about the right things! Being curious about each-others internal worlds, sends the message that you are interested and want to know more. Who doesn’t want to feel seen. 

The second is affection. Affection is the currency accepted in your emotional bank account, the more deposits you make the more secure your account in that relationship bank account will be. Show each-other affection, liking and care. This can be done in a grand manner or in small but significant ways.

Turn towards each-other. This third recipe can be hard especially if you’ve had a stressful day! But it’s crucial, whenever you notice distress – big or small, show interest, put away your devices, listen and ask questions. These are key moments for connection and every time you decide to turn towards, a deposit is made in your emotional bank account.

The fourth ingredient is positivity. Having a positive view of your relationship helps you tackle any barriers or relational roadblocks more effectively and efficiently. This does not mean you ignore any challenges or dissatisfactions, rather viewing your relationship more holistically and not focusing merely on the difficulties.

“Families need to fight. Just like countries fight to build a better world, families fight to better each other. Its healthy.” Drea Barris from #BlackAF captures the essence of the fifth ingredient perfectly. Conflict Management not conflict resolution, because relationships will never be short of conflict it’s unrealistic. Thus, it’s important to acquire conflict management skills for the days you don’t see eye to eye.

The sixth ingredient is support. It’s important to be supportive of each-others unique goals and dreams. Seek to understand the importance of these dreams and goals and respect each-others uniqueness and differences.

And the most crucial ingredients, your salt and pepper of relationships – Trust and Commitment. These two are the pillars of any relationship, when they are not present things start to crumble. Make trustworthiness your main priority, make a commitment to honor each-others positive qualities and reduce your focus on their negative faults. Keep in mind that trust is built during small positive moments, don’t wait for there to be a breach in trust to start building the trust.

Invest in your emotional bank account, the more you make consistent deposits - the less impact withdrawals will have on your overall relationship.

By Nadia Ahmed ~ Founder at Mind Matters