The 6 D’s of a successful Life:
Success, something we all strive for. It can mean a lot of different things for different people. It could be that tingling feeling of excitement about what you do, or that proud sense of achievement for sticking with what matters through hard times, or that satisfaction about living a life you can feel proud of in retrospect.
One absolute thing is that success is not a one-way street, but a constant journey. It is about pursuing the best in ourselves. Though many may not agree, the truth is that success can be as disorienting as failure and the trick to keeping the company of success is to continuously identify strongly with your true self, irrespective of the circumstances. The circumstances of our lives matter less than how we see them. What is important is to understand what makes our life worthwhile; that perspective is everything.
So, Why/How do people succeed? Is it because they’re smart? Or are they just lucky? Neither.
All of us have dreams and ambitions we strive to achieve throughout our life. No matter how big or small these goals are, success in achieving them you need the force and the energy within you to overcome inertia and initiate action. That force is called motivation and when it comes to your performance, motivation is one of the most important things you control. The good news is that it’s a skill you can build. It not only energies you but also helps you troubleshoot your thinking. Success doesn’t come easy. Apart from the passion, it also takes a lot of other things including, but not limited to; hard work, skill, focus, push – both physically and mentally, idea attitude to serve others. To be successful you need to persist through your failures and your ‘CRAP’ (‘CriticismRejectionAssholesPressure’).
You Deserve Success if you keep the six D’s in focus: Desire, Decision, Determination, Discipline, Dedication, and Dare.
‘Desire is the starting point of all achievement, not a hope, not a wish, but a keen pulsating desire which transcends everything
it is the single most important step in pursuit to achieve your dreams. The Importance of Desire to pursuing an idea and to turn them into reality is supreme. This is where it all begins because desire is what sparks the fire; the passion is what helps a person persevere despite the ups and the downs encountered. Desire keeps the person excited and willing to proceed with their dream, to do what it takes to make it a reality.
Knowing your goals gives you the direction required. You must know where you want to go to get there but you must have a desire to go there, to get going. Stronger the desire for your goals/dreams, greater is the surety to achieve it. You must not just superficially relate to your goals but must have a deep and clear understanding of why you want it. Dig a little deeper to find the reason why you want to achieve that particular goal. This WHY is what fuels your desire. Everyone is driven by a different desire. It is your unique reason that makes you relentlessly chase your dreams; it is the driving force behind why you want to succeed. So put in the effort to ask yourself
What drives you the most?
What is the first and the last thing on your mind when you wake up and drift off to sleep every day?
Does that thought bring a smile to you?
Is your desire strong enough for you to face every situation that comes along on your way?
Answers to these questions will help you identify your dream as well as the path you need to follow to achieve it. So take a moment and write down your dream, and the steps that will lead you to achieve them. That is the first step towards achieving your dream. Having the desire in the driver’s seat of your journey helps you to determine the direction you want to go and it gives you the strength to handle roadblocks and to navigate the uncharted path.
The irrationality of your Desire opens up the door to infinite possibilities. “In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.” ~ Bill Cosby
“Always go with the choice that scares you the most, because that’s the one that is going to help you grow.” ~ Caroline Myss
The Decision is where the journey from being a dreamer to an achiever begins. The moment you make a decision, you shape your destiny. Yes, it could go either way but taking a decision is important. While the right decisions can lead you to your goals, the wrong decisions provide with the very important lessons that are the pillars to success as well. So, both are equally beneficial if you use them righteously, don’t let the fear of a bad decision be a stumbling block to good decisions. Indecision is a trap you must avoid at all costs. Your daily decisions determine the life that you will live. Good decisions come from experience, and experience comes from bad decisions.
We make decisions all the time. Our decisions can range from the trivial ones, as simple as what to have for breakfast, lunch or dinner! to serious life-changing issues. Serious decisions range from career vs. business, choices to where you live, who you marry, how you spend your money, etc. We are responsible to make both the trivial as well as the serious decisions, for their success or failure, and bear the consequences of those decisions in life. You and only you are responsible for it. Making a decision is diving into a strong current that will carry you to places you never dreamed of while making the decision. At any point in time, you are only one decision, however small it is, from a different life.
To undertake any endeavor or initiative in life, the first thing you need to do is make a decision. Decide what it is that you want. Decision made with a definite purpose in line with your desires and goals draw the strength from them and help you stay on track and pull you up when chips are down. Whereas the decisions made in fear takes you down the negative spiral continuously. While making a decision, I always ask myself if the choice I am contemplating is going to take me closer to my goals or not. If the answer is a strong ‘Yes’ then that is the path I take. Nothing else and no one else matters. If the answer isn’t a ‘Yes’, then I move on to evaluate other options.
Another important aspect is to be confident about the decisions you are making. Doubts; “I think, I want…” or “maybe I will” should not have a room in your decision. It must rather be “I will” or better yet put your decisions as affirmations; like it is already happening “I am…” If getting that VP position in the company is what you decided for, put it as “I am the VP of my organization”. To be able to do this we must keep the goals realistic; stretch is ok but you must believe it to be possible.
In the end, it must be understood that while decisions are important, but they can be changed! You can change where and what want and form new habits. You can decide to form new and better habits. Stay committed to your decisions to achieve your goals, but stay flexible in your approach It will lead to success!
Make your decisions based on your current situation and that’s where you shall remain; Make decisions based on where you want to be and you shall ride the wings of Success...
“Nothing happens until you decide. Make a decision and watch your life move forward.” ~ Oprah Winfrey
“The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack in will.” ~ Vince Lombardi
Once you have identified your desire and the steps you need to take to achieve it, you will need to implement the remaining key factors of success. Is it always going to be smooth and easy? Of course not. Worthier the goals, more difficult are going to be the obstacles in the quest for it. You will need to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. So bigger the desire, bigger is going to be the determination required to reach it.
One quality that every successful person would state more than any other is determination. It is easy to sail through with tail-wind supporting you. But when the odds are against you it takes sheer determination to persevere and succeed. We all have obstacles in our lives that we must overcome and what helps you get through them is determination; or you may call it perseverance, persistence, endurance. Between the impossible and the possible lies your determination. The only fool-proof way to fail is to give up. Till you are unrelenting and are determined to not give up, the pursuit of your goal is alive; success is evident, it is only a matter of time.
Interestingly there is a direct relationship between the strength of your desire and your determination. How much do you want to succeed, determines how far you would go; how much effort would you put in even when you don’t feel like putting it in. Successful people fail too but are willing to keep trying until they succeed. That is determination. Values and skills also contribute to Self-determination by enabling people to take control of their lives and achieve success.
Wake up with determination. Go to bed with satisfaction.
F-E-A-R has two meanings: ‘Forget Everything And Run’ or ‘Face Everything And Rise.’. – Which one are you determined for
“Be more dedicated to making solid achievements than in running after swift but synthetic happiness.” ~ A. P. J. Abdul Kalam
Dedicate yourself to your direction and decision. It’s your level of dedication that will limit or enable your results. Not your skill, not your knowledge, not your resources, not your intellect but your dedication decides if you would go far enough to reach success or not. The attitude; “I Can” is most important in life.
Another important ‘D’ behind the success of a person is his/her level of dedication, which signifies the commitment of a person towards achieving objectives and life goals. Thus, dedication implies total devotion. Dedication is a quality that you must possess to see your goal through; it is the ultimate key to success in life. From the moment you set your mind on something until you achieve it; you have to be dedicated to the process of achieving that goal. The primary ingredient of dedication is hard work. That means you have to be consistent and dedicated to the game plan you have set for yourself. Hard work requires the right attitude, self-discipline and the ability to focus on one’s life goals and objectives. So to be dedicated to achieving the goal, undertakes lots of perseverance.
Another important aspect of staying dedicated is the understanding that failures are the stepping stones in the journey to success. So don’t let failures dissuade you, stride ahead with your hard work and stay focused. Wake every day with purpose and intent, remind yourself that you have a dream and with your relentless effort and dedication you will achieve it. Stay loyal and committed to the goals you’ve set even after the mood you said it in has left you.
To be successful you must develop and examine your dedication so as not to lose sight of the goals. Dedication is a quality that is possessed by all successful people and means being focused and to make optimal use of the available resources at disposal rather than complaining about the lack of facilities. Dedication is also an important attribute of a successful leader. A dedicated leader respects the team, keeps them engaged and keeps a conversation going throughout the life of the project. Dedication is fueled by communication and mutual respect.
Be dedicated to your cause, nothing else matters. Once you achieve your goals in life, rest everything fits in just fine…
“Dedication is belief transitioned into action which is transformed into change.” ~ Byron Pulsifer
“Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishments.” ~ Jim Rohn
Self-discipline or discipline of oneself is the ability to motivate oneself regardless of how you feel. It is the amalgamation of positive qualities as commitment, devotion, dedication, willpower, hard work, and persistence. That is why it is considered the single most important attribute to becoming successful. It helps you stay focused on reaching your goals, gives you the gumption to stick with difficult tasks, refrain from giving in to your impulses and make a better decision and allows you to overcome obstacles and discomfort as you push yourself to new heights.
Being disciplined isn’t about leading a restrictive and boring life void of enjoyment. It rather is one of the keys to living to your full potential. It liberates you from a lot of vices of yours like laziness, lethargy, worrying about the expectations and demands of others, weakness, fear, and doubts, etc. Discipline is the ability to control your impulses, emotions, reactions, and behaviors; take complete possession of your mind. It allows you to forego short-term benefits in favor of long-term satisfaction and gain. It can keep you from procrastinating or overspending, gives you the ability to handle difficult situations calmly, keeps you in the game by saying “no” when you really want to say “yes” to your temptations; helps in choosing between what you want now and what you want most.
Yes, the journey begins with a desire and the decision but that is not enough to go through the long road to your goals and more importantly to stay the course during it. You need to be disciplined in your actions to achieve your goals. Self-discipline helps you to become an unstoppable force of energy to any of your goals in life. Being disciplined about what you want, will become a habit. It is an attribute required to make any lasting change in life, irrespective of whatever aspect of life you want to achieve anything worth.
Discipline is simply unrelenting hard work. This makes it non-glamorous and not an easy quality to master, but then the pain of self-discipline will never be as great as the pain of regret. isn’t it? Discipline is also often misunderstood with being rigid or unrelenting. On the contrary, one of the key aspects of being disciplined is to be flexible and respond according to the changes around you. To be able to address problems that arise and provide solutions, and adapt to any new opportunity as it presents itself.
Discipline enables you to take control of your mind, thoughts, and actions, and stay on track; eventually leading you to accomplish your goals and be successful. It is a must-have quality, not only to become a winner but also to stay a winner.
Since self-discipline enables you to think first and act afterward; it is one companion that will never let you face regrets in life…
“Peace and happiness shall fill your mind deep within, if you act according to truth and self-discipline.” ~ Gobind Singh
“Often the difference between a successful man and a failure is not one’s better abilities or ideas, but the courage that one has to bet on his ideas, to take a calculated risk, and to act.” ~ Maxwell Maltz
A commonly used phrase ‘Success Comes to Those Who Will and Dare’ indicates no success is possible without unconquerable will and undaunted daringness.
Turning any dream into reality is what success is all about and the dream is defined as a cherished aspiration or ambition; often so far away from being achieved by the person considering it that it is also termed as a fantasy. So there is a big void between the current and the aspired situation. Dare is what could help build the bridge across this void.
Every success is first conceived in mind. Whether you can dare to accept in your mind that you could do it is the first step towards success. And then to endure a long effort and perseverance to turn that idea into tangible reality requires a lot more daring. You will be required to dare and look the failures in the eye and say, it doesn’t matter. You will not be able to taste the sweetness of success unless instead of being discouraged by failures you dare to say is that all you got, bring on more. Even the fortune favors the brave.
The path to every success is laden with obstacles, discouragements, failures, and setbacks. So have to be mentally prepared to take them on and dare to see failures as stepping stones to reach your goals. People who have created history or have left significant footprints on it are those who dared to face scores of stumbling block and challenges but steamrolled through them all without compromising with their vision. It’s not about the risk you take; it’s about the dare to take a step forward to achieve your dreams.
So keep trying and never give up is a mantra that guarantees success. Whenever you fall just dare to stand-up again and move on. You can’t lose until you accept defeat. The difference between winners and losers is the difference of their daring. Your conviction whether you CAN DO IT; or you CAN’T DO IT, is what creates all the difference in your life. So long as you stay daring to believe that you can and dare to continue trying, success will eventually be yours, it is only a matter of time
Like every other muscle we got, even the ‘risk muscle’ stays in shape only when exercised, else it degenerates. So make a point of using it at least once a day to do one thing every day that scares you.
“It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare, it is because we do not dare that they are difficult.” ~ Seneca
So, to conclude, let us agree that Success is a recipe that takes a complex mix of a lot of ingredients. However, following a standard recipe of these Six D’s could give you a good base for it. Follow your Passion; do it for love, not money. You deserve all the good things but nothing comes easy, so be ready for hard work. Be good rather strive to be the best in what you do. There is no magic, it’s all about practice, and practice and practice till you are there. Focus on that one thing, all of it. Push yourself both physically and mentally. Attitude to serve others is another secret ingredient to a long lasting success. Be open to new ideas; listen, observe, be curious, ask questions, make connections and look for solutions to the problem at hand. There is no reason why each of us should not get the success we deserve provided we rightfully earn it and dare to persist through our failures.
We are all worthy of success irrespective of whatever background we have come from. Believe in yourself and work towards your goals; you will get what you deserve as per the efforts put.
By Ezila Shedrack on 19 Nov 2020
By Ezila Shedrack on 14 Oct 2020